Hydrocodone addiction?

I am a 30 year old mother who is currently raising and supporting 6 children. Yes, I have a great job, and I make alot of money, however my funds are being depleted quickly due to my addiction. I am so scared. I took 10 hydrocodone 7.5's and 6 hydrocodone 10's today. I have gotten really bad lately. I have been taking the drugs for 3-4 years now, and my addiction has never been worse. It seems that I am sick every day if I don't have the drugs, I am so jittery, and the diarrhea is the worst. When I don't have the drugs, I am jittery, in pain, and dehydrated from severe diarrhea. I am so tired of going to bed and praying that I wake up in the morning. I am the main bread winner in my household, and I can't take the time to go to a detox clinic. I have to do this all on my own. Are there any over the counter meds that may help? I am so afraid because I can see my life slipping away before my very eyes. I need help. Does anyone kow how I can get over this on my own and get my life back?